REQUIEM FOR LOVE

Today is an unusual. For just a few moments I escape the insanity that surrounds me. I abandon the cloak of despair that surrounds me like a shroud. The darkness recedes and sunshine fills my soul. The cause, thoughts of my beloved. Ah! She is a sight to behold and I reach for her even though she is far away. Yet the light of her smile, her gentle voice and tender touch are indelibly imprinted on my mind and causes me delight beyond measure. It is she who has driven away my despair, my hopelessness and my fear. No greater love there ever was and I revel in these thoughts. But alas I must return to reality. I must begin to deal with the pain that I have caused her. A pain so deep that it has lacerated her very soul. She is a wounded bird left in a void of uncertainty. Her pain is mine yet with an intensity that she will never know; she suspects, such is her understanding of me. Her anger lays bare my soul while her pain brings me to tears. I cry for her and for all of the things that I have destroyed! I fear that I shall never see the sunshine of her smile or witness the beauty of her eyes as they twinkle with joy. Nor feel the warmth of her embrace that sets my soul aflame and ignites all of my senses. I am obsessed with her. How do I give her up as surely I must? I must amputate my emotions and cauterize the wounds. I must narcotize myself against the resulting pain, pain that is sure to last throughout eternity. Now is the time that I must turn her away while yet her wounds are raw and pray that her healing be swift. This is my love and I cannot and will not allow her to follow me into a world of insanity, of uncertainty; into a world of darkness. And when the pain is yet bearable she will understand that my love trandscends all acts of selfishness and has not taken its final breath. In the years to come she will learn to forgive me for such is the intensity of her love for me. And I will always hold her close, taste the sweetness of he lips and feel the warmth of her nearness. And in my mind she will be the sun that greets me each day and the stars that bid me goodnight. She will remain in my heart forever! All Things Considered. Madu